What Forgiveness Isn't

What Forgiveness Isn't
6 myths that may be keeping you from letting go.
by Denise George

I read this tonight before heading to the comfort of my bed and it got me to thinking on the the people and events that still today I struggle to forgive! I tend to forgive and then take it back quite quickly, especially with matters that are deeply rooted in my childhood. This article applied to me, how about you? Do you struggle to forgive? What about to be forgiven? Do you still feel the need to pack around the things that Christ has shed his blood for in your life? The full article can be read at What Forgiveness Isn't on the Christianity Today website.

Myth 1: Forgiving means the offender didn't really hurt you.
Myth 2: Forgiving means you excuse the offender's hurtful act.
Myth 3: Before forgiving, you must first understand why the offender hurt you.
Myth 4: Before forgiving the offender, you must feel forgiving.
Myth 5: Forgiving means the offender will face no consequences.
Myth 6: When your offender is punished, you'll find closure.

The Choice to Forgive

The decision to forgive an offender is probably the hardest choice we can ever make. Some crimes seem too horrible to forgive. Our instincts tell us to avenge the person who caused us pain, not to release him from the debt he owes us. But as Christians, we can't afford to have unforgiving hearts, for we have been greatly forgiven by God in Christ (Ephesians 4:32).

Only forgiveness can release us from a life of hatred and bitterness. "Forgiving is a journey, sometimes a long one," wrote Lewis B. Smedes in Shame and Grace. "We may need some time before we get to the station of complete healing, but the nice thing is that we are being healed en route. When we genuinely forgive, we set a prisoner free and then discover the prisoner we set free was us."

Forgiveness ABC's

Acknowledge the hurt. When someone deliberately hurts you, don't try to diminish the pain and its effect on you. Acknowledge your suffering - and express it aloud to God. Scripture promises: "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" (Psalm 34:18), and "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds" (Psalm 147:3).

Blame the offender. If a person hurts you by mistake, she didn't mean to inflict pain, so she needs no forgiveness. But if a person intentionally hurts you, then the pain she caused was deliberate. Say aloud: "I personally blame you, (name of offender), because you hurt me on purpose." Correctly placing the blame readies you to begin the forgiveness process.

Cancel the debt. You've acknowledged the hurt and rightly blamed the offender. Now you're ready to make the willful decision to "cancel the debt" your offender owes you. Find a quiet place to be alone and ask the Lord's help in forgiving the person who hurt you. You might pray the "Lord's Prayer" (Matthew 6:9-13) and meditate on verse 12: "Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." After you've prayed and while you're still alone, speak aloud your decision to forgive: "(Name of offender), I've chosen to forgive you for hurting me; I've decided to cancel the debt you owe me." You've now embarked on the process of forgiving the person who hurt you. —D.G.
Forgiveness what a concept! To be free of the burdens of those that I have harmed and those that have harmed me I am so thankfull for the grand design of God's plan and Christ blood.

What gets me out of bed in the morning

"I wanna boiling egg- no oak! "
and My eyes are not even open yet and she is at the side my bed with her pooh blankysippy cup with water in tow demanding food! I need to teach her to hit the ON button on the coffee maker before she get hungry.
I'm up, I guess, but first I try the ol' "Sweety, are your brothers up yet?"
"Nope just me...." she is smiling with her crazy bed-head hair that is always in her eyes.
"Did you have a good sleep or a bad sleep? huh, yeah, cause I had a good sleep!" smile-giggle.
I look at the clock and see that I have no grounds to try to stay in bed, it is well after a decent time to sleep until....okay it's 8:45! Good moms are out of bed by this time whipping up pancakes & coffee..... okay- okay, I am up!

It is not that I like to sleep in, because I don't. Beds are not that much fun to stay in alone! (wink-wink).... My husband's internal clock has him out of bed as soon as he wakes up at 6am. And it is not that I like to go to bed, because I don't, I prefer the night times when all good little people are in bed. The thought of another day excites me with possibilities. When I wake I try to grasp that God has handed me another day and says "try this one on for size, I am not done with you yet!". I try to start the day thanking God for the coffee that consumes my brain, the children that want to talk and talk immediately the moment that her eyes are open.....my feet hit the floor and that is when I remember.......
I am a back pain suffer and I hate to get moving and feel the pain again in this new day when while I am asleep or just waking up I feel normal, healed, whole, human... I do not want to complain God has given me a new day, a fresh TODAY and I am up for the smiles, laughter and challenges. Bring it on


So what is it that get you out of bed? I would love to know.......

Welcome Home

Today as I bask in the glory of God's grace. I have a home to call my own, where I put a pot of coffee on for my Friend and I. We sit and enjoy the good things in life. My Friend listens and we have a great conversation about life.... God.... kids..... mothering. I am overwhelmed. I am blessed. I do not want to say this lightly but I love those little things in life that daily I take for granted. I am surrounded by more things than I will ever need and yet I catch myself wanting for things of this world. That is until I feel the Spirit of the Lord remind me of the treasures that are being stored in heaven just for me. God is encouraging me to trust more in who He has made me to be. Live in faith not in fear. I wonder about the welcome that I will receive when I reach the promise land, when my Dad says "welcome home my child......"

If money and time were no object, what would your ultimate dream vacation be?

First and formost I love my kid & yet thought about leaving them at home for this vacation but then I remembered that $ is no object so I would bring along the babysitter. With my whole family in tow, including the in-laws and out-laws, parents and siblings.... i would love to take a Club Med vacation.

It's just a dream, but a girl can dream, can't she?

How about you?

It's a meme, so jump on in!

Frustrations of Blogging Red-neck Woman
I hate that somedays I want more.....
the double wide is not enough.

I hate that I don't drink more....
I still remember today.

I hate that I know that this is not all there is.....
here is not my home it is my hotel until eternity.

Jet Set To Vancouver

We arrive home from our lil' visit to BC Children's Hospital for Mack and he is fine. We will return in January to recheck the growht of the bump/lump that is mainly cartilage. His wonderful Dr. Alverez is very confident that what he has is of no concern. He had a CT scan this am to assure us all. Praise the Lord for the blessing of healthy bumps!

A Meme for Book Lovers

Okay I've been tagged by the orgjunkie and I have not a clue as to what the heck meme is or tagging so I will wing it, here it goes.....

1. One book that changed your life: the Bible. I am saved by the living word of God daily. Brought back to grace, lifted out of self and restored, renew and refreshed by the living water that flows from the pages.

2. One book that you've read more than once: the Narnia series. I refuse to see the movie because I do not want to ruin the books for me.

3. One book you'd want on a desert island: Definitely my Bible! AMEN Sista!

4. One book that made you laugh: I cannot remember...I know that I laugh a lot I am just not sure that I read funny books other than childrens books. THis picture makes me laugh, not only because I CANNOT figure out how to turn it but also be cause my 3 year thinks she can read like her BIG brothers do!

5. One book that made you cry: You Are Special, by Max Lucado. A childs book I know but we are all God's children and the message it to all young and old.

6. One book that you wish had been written:the Oprah story, maybe an autobiography

7. One book you wish had never been written:A Million Little Piece! Memoirs or not it was bad!

8. One book you are currently reading:Pratical Sex Tips for the Christian Husband. The hubby is reading it too. We don't talk about it much..lol

9. One book you've been meaning to read: Sheet Music. It is on the same subject as the previous book. It is also written by a christian author.

Either kids books or sex books that is an interesting fact that I had not seen before. I wonder what that means......I should ask my therapist when I get one. I am not sure how the tagging works so I will refrain until next time.
END NOTE: I love the smell of a new book too! Laura you are not alone!

We are back from our summer of adventure... and summer is already 1/2 over YIKES!

In June we were in my home stompin' grounds, Fort St John, for 2 weeks. We being my 3 children and I, my gal pal and sister in Christ, Kim and her 2 kids, plus my sisters 2 girls that we picked up along the way, from Prince George. You know that you are in the true north when entering town there is a sign saying

-Sporting Goods! - Hunting, Fishing and Camping Supplies!-

with a big picture of a mule deer with a Boon and Crockett rack! Being from the north I come by the red-neck girl thing' honestly. The trip is 13 hours in total, 7 hours east to Prince and 5 hours north to Taylor, which is about10 min. out of FSJ. We swam in all sort of water, 2 pools, 2 rivers, 1 lake and a water fight buckets. We were fortunate to have great weather and wonderful hospitality. We ripped it up in the Goodlow area! Tore up the buffalo fields -quite literally we drove through a friends herd of buffalo..... it was pretty awe inspiring to feel so small. The raw desire to own land, have a garden and maybe a buffalo or two..... (okay that might be too far), but it did get me thinking about what I want and who I am in God's eyes and my desire to honor what he has designed me to be.
Back to the trip: My Mama took a break and decided on coming home to Kitimat with us...... we stayed a couple of days in Prince George, with my sister, Jan.
Jan and Jack are both amazing people, there is none better... they both are so great! Both work full time and have a home with 5 acres, a rent-a-dog and cat that is perpetually pregnant and 7, sometimes 8, sometimes 9 kids.... she used to have 3 kids & he used to have 4... now they have 7 in total.... they have it down to an art.... plus they are host to a sympathy squatter, who has been there since x-mas! His 2 children come for visits on weekends... but that story I will save for another day. Needless to say when we roll to town with our extra mouths to feed and heads to lay down there is a house full but they are gracious and good hearted.

So my mom was here for 2 weeks, one of which we went out to Kemano. Kemano is a 2 hour boat ride down the channel from Kitimat where Rick works at the power house. We were home from Kemano for ONE night and then off onto the start of our family vacation. Dropped my ma off in Prince George at my Grandma and headed straight through to Quesnel. I do not want to talk about that, I will just say cheep motel on the highway and a 5am wake up call... the up side is that we arrived in Vernon to Harry's place at a great time. His real name is Elroy, but we call him Harry for short. Harry calls Rick Harry also so it gets kind of weird from there.
Friday we went to the Resort at white lake which is between Salmon Arm and Sorrento. A nice quite little place that is until we showed up! 27 of us in 5 cabins and one camper. It was wonderful. 42 degrees! An ice machine, plenty of beer and soda, great food, and family what more could a person ask for. There were turtles in and ducks the lake and so the little ones loved that! Most all of the day was spent basking in the sun in the comfort of the floating toys. Good times! We spent until Monday at the resort and then it was off to Trail for the remainder of the 2 ½ weeks.
In trail we just hung out and at and lounged. I should say that the kid and I hung out and lounged, Rick did a ton of work around his ma's home as well as at the neighbors yard. He is such a good hearted man. We had no schedule and no plans. It was great. I was able to hit the best sales at the thrift and consignment stores...... I love a fabulous bargain.
On route home we stopped in at Sicamous to visit a couple of my uncles. Jake who lives in Sicamous works as a dock builder/designer. Check out www.envirofloat.com to see some amazing work that he has done. The other uncle is Ali, and he and his family were up the lake at the shack for the week. (shack... huge georgous log home!) So my amazing cousin Ashley, Ali's oldest daughter, took us up there by boat the next day. What a life! He has a beauty of a new Malibu boat that made me look cool and 21 again! No one was actually looking' at me with Isabelle and Ash in the boat anyways!

Home from the SUNNY SIDE of BC......Aren't holidays the greatest!!
Will update this thing soon. My awe and honor to those who blog regularily.